XCVIII. Michael. February 4, 2022
>driving Lyft
>I am called to the VA to pick up Michael
>he calls me again before I get there
>says to come right up front and he will be standing there
>so I pull up to the VA and there is a guy standing there
>I say “Hey, are you Michael?”
>guy says “Yeah, I’m Michael, are you the Uber?”
>I am indeed the Uber
>off we go
>guy says “I’m glad you got here. I was about to walk down the hill and wait for the bus. This is for you.”
>he hands me a clear plastic bag with money in it.
>the plastic bag has “$12.50” written on it
>I say thanks, because that’s a hell of a tip
>guy says “I need you to take me to Dunwoody Street”
>”Wow,” I say, “The GPS is WAY off. It’s got me going up Thomasville Road”
>my phone rings
>on the other end is a guy claiming to be Michael
>he says I drove right past him and left him standing at the VA
>I say this is difficult to believe
>since Michael is in my backseat
>the caller insists he is the correct Michael
>so I apologize and head back
>I say “Man, what are the odds? Two guys named Michael waiting for Lyfts at the same time?”
>Guy says “then can I have my money back, boss?”
>the bag is returned
>when we get back to the VA, my correct Michael is standing there
>My passenger gets out and says “Hey Michael, I’m Michael! I’m sorry about that!”
>The new Michael shakes his hand and says it’s okay
>we drive away
>as soon as we leave the parking lot, new-Michael says “That man name ain’t no Michael!
>”I know that old crackhead from down in the Villages, out here saying he Michael
>”stealing people’s Ubers,
>”needs his ass beat is what he needs”
>I tell Michael the story of previous Michael’s time in my car
>he tells me of previous Michael’s time in the Villages
>and soon we are both laughing
>when I drop him off, I promise Michael I will tell this story to everyone
>and get his name right
LMFAOOOOOO “he need his ass beat” I haven’t used this in so long, it’s almost nostalgic.