>driving Lyft >pick up a guy at the airport named Zaytoven >yes >like Beethoven >but with a Z >Zaytoven >Yeah? Well, fuck you >all names are made up
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>driving Lyft >stop for lunch at Captain D’s >the car in front of me turns the wrong way down an access road >just as another car turns down the road…
>driving Lyft >I get a phone call on my way to a pickup >guy says he represents a company that helps veterans >says if I drive this passenger to a…
>driving Lyft >pick up this older Black lady >she is quiet for most of the ride >then she says “So you’re a retired cop?” >wat >I say “Oh no, no…
>driving Lyft >it is well past midnight on the Southside >I am crawling through a labryrinthine trailer park >my passenger tries to guide me, but even she is stymied by…
>driving Lyft >when I arrive at a pickup location, a timer starts, and I am required to wait five minutes >at some point during that five minutes, if I do…
>driving Lyft >the app says I am picking up someone named “Xx” >pull into the parking lot >there is a dude standing there >nobody else is around >I say “Hey…
>driving Lyft >I pick up this little kid, about four or five, and his mother >kid says “Hello, driver. My name is King” >I say “Well hey, little man, how…
>driving Lyft >I have four college girls piled in the backseat >they look and sound like New Jersey >so probably from Miami >we are going down a crowded residential road…
>driving Lyft >I am fourth in line at one of those stupid gate callboxes >foiled by the power of gated security >with its all-knowing callbox >such a callbox prevents hooliganism…