>driving Lyft >taking two college girls to an apartment complex >I say “What’s the apartment number?” >girl says “32304” >I look at the buildings >it’s dark, can’t see numbers >drive…
>driving Lyft >pick up this blind couple >they are going to Shula’s, a fancy steakhouse >the lady says she is worried about the dress code because she is wearing tennis…
>driving Lyft >pick up this old guy >drive him down Gaines Street >Gaines Street is the Canyon of Heroes >if the Canyon was a Wadi with Craft Mac and Cheese…
>driving Lyft >I ain’t in the best of moods already >I pull up to Baby WalMart >we call it Baby WalMart because it is inexplicably smaller than the other three…
>driving Lyft >there is much construction on Pensacola Street >as I thread the orange cones >I see a porta-potty lying on its side in the middle of the road >I…
>driving Lyft >it is late night party time in Collegetown >pick up three very large college dudes in front of Township >one says “Hey Uber, drive down here and let…
>driving Lyft >I am called to the VA to pick up Michael >he calls me again before I get there >says to come right up front and he will be…
>driving Lyft >pick up a guy at the airport named Zaytoven >yes >like Beethoven >but with a Z >Zaytoven >Yeah? Well, fuck you >all names are made up
>driving Lyft >stop for lunch at Captain D’s >the car in front of me turns the wrong way down an access road >just as another car turns down the road…
>driving Lyft >I get a phone call on my way to a pickup >guy says he represents a company that helps veterans >says if I drive this passenger to a…